Lightning in a Bottle

I get that not many people, if any and all, read my LiveJournal- not many people care, which I understand- but I needed to post anyway. I need to get this off my chest. 

I’m not dumb, or stupid, or as self-centered as some may think (and by some I’m referring to my parents). No, not at all- I get people, their way of thinking and usually I know exactly what they are feeling and exactly what they need to hear; note what they NEED          to hear as oppose to what they WANT to hear. And maybe it’s that insight that makes people believe I’m ten years older then my real age (thank you Monica) but I would like to put this out there- I could be 100 years old and I still refuse to be the parent, guardian or nanny to everybody else’s children. That would be somebody else’s job. 

Now I get that part of this breakdown is because of my job- are you all ready for it?- I’m a day care worker and as evil and bitchy as I seemed I as very good and loving at what I do. But when my shift ends (on time, the days when people actually remember they have kids who need to be picked up BEFORE the day care closes) I don’t want to have to go from raising one set of children to raising another. Especially when I am not getting paid for it. 

So I’m sitting in the back of my closet, which I have emptied out into two suitcases, and I’m complaining to the only person(s) who don’t expect everything/or anything from me- everyone and anyone who happens by my livejournal and feels the need to read a depressing, bitchy rant. (By the way if you are in the process of reading this- Thank You). Tomorrow is Mother’s Day and right now I can’t stand to look at my mother- all she does is push, push, push, like I’m the hired help instead of her oldest child. And even though Father’s Day is next month I don’t think my father will be on my ‘good’ list either. I mean, if you ask them I’m completely useless and every time we fight- which is often and loud (I’m Italian), they threaten to kick me out. Well I’m sick of their damn trump card so I did as they wished- I started to pack my bags. Apparently it was a bluff that they thought I would never call them on because all of the sudden I’m their golden child- I was right. 

Of course I’m right but why, somebody please tell me, does it take me leaving for them to figure it out??? And so their was more yelling, and crying (which I’m not proud to admit I took part in) until finally they were begging me to stay… and I gave in. So for now (and for anyone who cares) I’m staying right where I am, until the next fight I suppose when I lose my mind and get a free stay in a mental home as oppose to having to pay for an apartment.

Okay rant over! You all may return to your regular programming (LOL… I always wanted to say that!)

-Girlygirl